February 3, 2011

• Been MIA the last two-ish days... kind of. More internet-wise. Haven't really been answering e-mails. Haven't really checked facebook. Haven't really done anything productive. I feel like I just shut down. I hope I have no trouble powering back up for work tomorrow. I did spend a wee bit more time talking to and spending time with my parents though. Got to talk to my long lost brother, play games with him and watch a movie with him... virtually via xbox live. The movie thing was pretty cool. We were both watching a movie on Netflix via xbox live and we could talk to each other, comment on the movie, ask questions, etc. Though there might not be a person sitting right next to you, it beats watching a movie completely alone. Now I better understand those TV and movie scenes where two people are on the phone watching the same channel. I guess it is normal, but I've never really done that with anyone.

  My mom's worried about me and my singleness. I told her I'm okay with it (and I really am), but it makes me feel like I shouldn't be... like I should be trying or something, but I don't want to. I told her I just haven't met the guy, not the right guy at least, and I truly don't think I have. I dunno if it's true or not, but I feel like when he comes along.. I won't be able to ignore my heart and I'll just know. I'm not worried, but that's half true. I feel like I don't have enough time. Not worried about finding someone, but worried that I won't get married and have kids while I still consider myself "young". I know I shouldn't because God's got it all laid out already.. but my human, calculating, logical side does.

  Haven't really talked to Connie in a long time. Kinda sad. I don't know why. Ever since coming back from Nica I've felt kinda disconnected. I don't think it's her. I think it's me. I feel disconnected. I wish she could just teleport here, or I there, so we could catch up.

  I need to go sleep.

  • 1:52 am
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